Saturday, March 24, 2012

~*And The Hackles Went Up*~

As a larger sized family (and still growing) we, occasionally, come across ignorant folks that say unkind things or make sudden assumptions about our family.  

Most often, though, we are blessed to meet kindness and graciousness so when I do come face-to-face with ignorance my Mama-bear hackles go up!  

We recently went to one of our fave Spring family activities held at a place we are members of.  We find it makes more sense, financially, to purchase the family pass each year.  

The Volunteer simply looks at our card and reads that it says "One Child" on it and wouldn't proceed with the transaction.  I explained to her they do not issue a new card each time we add to the family but the computer system is correct; as we try to come frequently.  

She looks it up and does read that we, indeed, have 4 children listed on the computer system.  However, she adamantly insists that we have a FAMILY pass.  With my Mama-bear hackles ALL the up at this point I tell her, "YES, we *ARE* family".  I nearly spouted that they were my children no matter the color the of their skin.  But, I tried to remain the face of ignorance.

It was so very difficult to hold my tongue at that moment.  These are my children, regardless of race.  
These are my children, regardless of appearances.
Don't mess with a Mama-bear and never, ever assume that a multiracial family is NOT a family.

I think my biggest frustration was her assumption that just because it said "4 children" on the system it couldn't possibly include the two African American children standing before her. 

We did go on to enjoy our time and upon reflecting on this Volunteer's attitude I am still happy to say we don't come across it often.

Have you come across something similar?
Would you have handled it differently?  



  1. Sorry you ran into that, I bet I know which lady helped you - she wasn't all the way with it. We just bought our memberships yesterday and were trying to get the military membership and she kept getting very confused and taking weird amounts off the price, etc.

    Anyway, I am sure my mother-in-law ran into this. Tim's brothers that are twins are African America or black or however we should say it (I never know but they do just say black) and he also has another adopted sister and a biological sister. People just don't expect it. Once we were buying a present for one of Tim's brothers and he was describing him to the lady working (JCPenney) and she did not get that he meant he was his brother, she thought he meant "my brother" as in close friend or buddy, you know what I mean - she didn't think of him being able to be his brother, either. Oh yeah, and one of his sister's was a waitress and had a family discount, and had trouble with getting them to get the discount for her brother for the same reason! But I'm sure my MIL and FIL had many more issues like this.

    I loved your family, I could not believe how patient they were! And they seemed so sweet! And I LOVED your youngest boy's hair!

  2. Some people definitely don't get it. I love your beautiful colorful family! What a joy and a blessing!

  3. We have two adopted kiddos but they are bi-racial like the rest of our family. I think instead of getting upset you might use it as an oppurtunity to share God'slove. Look at them and say "Yes, my family a beautiful reflection of God's Love!"I think your family is a beautiful reflection of our Lord Jesus. I especially, like the pictures of the handsome young man on the post shortly before this one. May the Lord continue to shine His glorious face upon you and yours! Blessings Kyle @ roosterhill :)


~*I enjoy hearing from people so please leave a comment or question but due to *spam* I am having to moderate comments*~