Thursday, January 17, 2013

~*Have You Ever?*~

Have you ever posted something then later hopped on over to another blog you follow and had their recent post complement yours perfectly?

That just happened to me!  

I was saying {here} how difficult it is to parent Sunshine because the normal parenting tactics don't work for him.  He doesn't make the cause and affect connection in his brain.  

With your average emotionally stable child consequences are learned and they make the cause/affect or action/reaction connection and it prevents them from repeating said behavior, at least most of the time!

With Sunshine that is just not true. He will do a behavior to death...I seriously mean TO DEATH....where your so over the behavior your preparing the funeral, writing the eulogy and ordering flowers 

Done.to.death.

To be able to fill a parenting toolbox with ideas would be fabulous but I never thought of it as freedom. Ever! The main issue being that I am still grieving for this child...

Dorothy over at {Urban Servant} was just talking about how some our children do not fit into the standard box and cannot be parented the say way as other children.  

She says, "Before I felt the freedom I was afraid. I wanted answers and methods. Concrete cause and effect policies that would keep our life smooth the outcome predictable.

Before I let go I was afraid to trust my God with my children.  I was afraid to trust my life and my reputation and my comfort to my God."

Whoa....has somebody had a front row seat to what is going on in my brain?  

I'm working on grieving for my boy....then simply celebrating and loving him for who and what he is.  Its a process people and I'm not to the embracing freedom part yet...(my kiddo came at my newborn with fists flying)...I need a moment to gather my thoughts and not quite to the point of rejoicing...yet....

Yet, I have hope in the Lord that we will have an awful lot of celebrating to do!

His life is precious and I adore this boy!
Period!      

 

2 comments:

  1. i'm so glad you were able to be encouraged on this, friend! there is so much pressure on us as parents from other parents in the Church to have it "all figured out" and to make sure that we "present well." sometimes, kids just don't "fit the suit" (remember that Brady Bunch episode?!) and they take extra love and attention in order to find a "suit" that works for them. kudos to you for bucking the pressure and giving Sunshine what he needs. still praying for all of you!

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  2. I think something that completely caught me off guard was when I found myself mourning over what others thought of my parenting skills. I made my own clothes in middle school for goodness sake, I have never been concerned with what others think. God was full of grace bringing this to the table for me to deal with - he is so amazing. My kids are who God made them to be - today that WILL be my joy.

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