Monday, May 13, 2013

~*Testimony Tuesday- May 13th*~

 If you would like to share your testimony please contact me {here}.

This weeks Testimony is shared by my sweet friend, Lorraine. She has been our biggest prayer warrior, friend and supporter throughout this long adoption journey! Seeing my children snuggled up in the afghan she made for us makes the whole thing come full circle. That blanket was prayed over for the many hours it took her to make and they are literally surrounded, now, by her words and the warmth of her heart!

Lorraine Szontagh's Testimony: 

I grew up having heard about God and the importance of going to church on Sunday. I attended Catholic school and church but did not know God. I remember when I was in the 3rd grade I was very curious. I asked one of the teachers why Jesus had to die on a cross. I remember exactly what she told me, "To open the gates of heaven." I had no clue of what that meant and was too embarrassed to ask any other questions, but that question and semi-answer stayed with me and bothered me. I had so many questions but no answers were coming. I remember thinking maybe i needed to find a religion that would answer my questions. Fast forward to high school. When I was a senior, I took a World Religions Class. That really piqued my curiosity. For Lent that year, I decided to read the New Testament. I also enlisted in the Navy.
Reading the New Testament was interesting. I didn't really understand much other than the stories about the life of Jesus. I kept at it though. At the same time, I got an assignment in my religions class to write a report about a religion other than my own. My best friends went to a Baptist church. I figured that would do so I went there a few times to do research. I got a feeling that there was something happening there that I needed. Also, time to ship out with the Navy was rapidly approaching. I have struggled with panic attacks all of my life. As it was getting closer to time to leave, my panic was getting worse. At that time, I had no idea what it was, I just figured I was "crazy".
But crazy or not, I knew there was no way I could survive this. I started praying. I told God that if He was real, He needed to get me out of this impossible situation - one cannot just un-enlist. Well, God used my temper. My dad told me to clean the cat's litter box and I stamped my foot and yelled at him; I stamped my foot right down a flight of stairs and messed up my ankle. When i reported that to the Navy office along with the fact that it was healing very slowly, they told me that due to the fact that I was a female, they would have to discharge me. If I had been a male, they would have put me into a holding company. Impossible situation taken care of!

Slowly I came to a saving knowledge of Christ. I learned not only about Him but learned to know Him. I realized my need of a Savior.
I wish I could say that I have never doubted again, but I am weak. I am a human! In June 2001, I miscarried for the second, possibly third time. I was devastated. One Sunday, I was sitting home alone while my family was at church. I was trying to pray. I was trying to read the Bible. I couldn't feel anything but pain and loneliness and emptiness. WHY??

God showed me something that I need to keep remembering. In John chapter 11, I read the account of Jesus raising his friend, Lazarus, from the dead. Jesus knew Lazarus was ill and he DELIBERATELY took His time going and LET Lazarus die. He was going to go there and raise him and He knew it. When He arrived, He met with the family and friends and saw their pain and I believe, a bit of anger; certainly a lot of not understanding why. At that point, knowing fully what He was going to do, Jesus wept. He did not weep because Lazarus was dead, I believe He wept because His friends were so so sad and confused. He wept, because He felt their pain. In the same way, He knows how we feel, how we hurt.

God allows things to happen; things we don't always like or understand, but He is not unfeeling in it. I believe He still hurts when we do.

 Matthew 24:14

And this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come.

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