Wednesday, August 14, 2013

~*30 Days of Thoughts: Celebrating the Good 'Ole Days*~

No....I'm not talking about celebrating the days before our RADlings came...although, I *know* beyond a shadow of a doubt that ALL RADical parents have had those thoughts. 

Is there shame in having those thoughts? No! I truly think it is normal and, just maybe, healthy to have those thoughts. Looking at the time ~before~ and having a fleeting wish for the old days, then getting back in the game and knowing they are worth every single ounce of blood, sweat and tears we put into them. Those are healthy and healing thoughts. 
Very unamused, JJ, took a paintball to the mouth...tasted nasty but he had a fab time with dad!

What I am actually celebrating, today, are the GOOD days! The emotionally regulated days. The days of good choices and great problem solving skills. The days of negotiation and sharing.  The days of cheerful obedience and helping hands.   The days of cooperative play and playful cheer.
Mini-golfing with Grampster...minor issues and twas a grand time! I praised them all the way home!

I can actually tell I've lost weight...but that's for another post.


They are to be highly praised and valued!  Make a big deal out of the good and the grand!  
Mmm, suckers at Grandma's retirement party. The wrapper said, "It sucks that your leaving!"

You need to lock in those memories far more because the trauma of the past will quickly erase the good feelings.  When the fear becomes greater, inside, than the good feelings the behaviors will return.  It will be almost, as if, the good 'ole days never happened. 
True blue smiles and no pretense...i.e. a real moment!

Psalm 145:7
They celebrate your abundant goodness
    and joyfully sing of your righteousness.   

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

~*30 Days of Thoughts: One of Them Days*~

Today is one of those days that there is more screaming, crying, hitting and yelling than nice words and hugs.  

It gets crazy loud in here and I often wonder what we must sound like from the outside looking in. My throat is strained and sore from repeating, "If you scream I will kiss you and hug you. I'm not mad at you. Use your words, please, not your hands."

I have older children that are affected by the behaviors of the three with RAD and they, sometimes, forget after having so many good days, what they need to do when the bad days hit. 

This is often a lonely and thankless job, yet one I love and would do all over again.  So, when we're having these bad days and I hold a child that is not RADical and remind them that it isn't them and its not personal, this one time I remember to shake my finger at myself....I am a great mom and its nothing personal. RAD stinks, it just is what it is, and we'll have the good days again...

Until then, I go back to survival tactics and reteach the same lessons over and over again. Someday they will heal and someday the trauma that dictates so many of their decisions and choices will not control them. 

Love you my little RADiant ones!

Ephesians 2:10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

~*30 Days of Thoughts: Tea Time!*~

I gave up numbering these...I write as I can and that just doesn't happen daily.

We had a great discussion on the Book of Faces about my solution for our family's snack time issue. 

We have one snack a day (around 3pm) and my kiddos like variety but I don't want to break the bank and I do not want to be in the kitchen baking everyday, either.

On T-days we have tea time! I break out the good tea cups, when will they ever truly be used? I bake up something yummy and we enjoy picking out a new tea to try.

The rest of the days? 
Sometimes flavored and sometimes not.
I try to buy locally grown but sometimes not.

Even my grown up boys like the fancy-pants tea time. Its a fun and refreshing time together. 

Do you have things you do with your children you'd like to share?
What's your favorite popcorn flavor?

Favorite tea time treat?

Proverbs 11:25
A generous person will prosper;
    whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.